Stone CC vs Gravesend 5ths

“Blow, winds, and crack your cheeks! Rage, blow!

You cataracts and hurricanoes, spout

Till you have drenched our steeples, drowned the cocks!”

The rains were threatening and the clouds were dark but cricketers are nothing if not optimistic. We could all see the sun above the clouds and we were determined to play.

The oppo arrived singing “The Wheels On The Bus” that truly reflected their average age. Tom, Jack and Jordan looked like elder statesmen in comparison. We agree to a shortened timed game of 2 hours and then 30 mins plus 20 overs to try and beat the impending storm.

We elect to bowl and like weather warriors we took to the field. Chung Fu, slinking in like the panther he is,is unplayable and, with the new and improved Tom, set about the opposition batsmen like 2 tornadoes, sweeping through and clearing up everything in their path. 25/5! Chungy takes a superb hat-trick, which was perfectly complimented by a stunning catch by our number 2 ‘keeper Stumpy for the 3rd wicket. (He averages that out later……) Tom gets the other 2 and we are starting to wonder just how long this game is going to take. They could be 50 all out, which may be a great success, but we need to make a game of it. 2 young lads at the crease are doing their best to keep our strike bowlers out but can’t score. So, time to set up the wind breaks and give them some respite. The old timer Dartsy at one end and Quaker Oaten at the other and they start to score a bit, but not much, as both bowled good lines but without any luck. As Dartsy will tell you, he feels Stumpy has something against him by dropping a nick behind again. (Let it go Dartsy, let it go!) Jack Rogers, having been peeled from his pit, comes on next and looks like he has never been away. Walkling at the other end and more of the same but with a bit more luck. 2 slips in place, occasional silly mid on and off, leg slips and all sorts. The ball starts to go to hand and Jack begins to clear up the rest of the innings with a hand in all 5 wickets to fall. Chungy snaps one at second slip, even though he was at first, and nearly flattens Cameron with the effort. Stumpy gets a somewhat awkward stumping that almost became a run out. The storm ravaged batsman take on Jack’s arm and regret it as the throw whistles in and leaves him well short. They had a slogger who come in, clearly all padded up for some serious onslaught that he was expecting us to unleash, but all he really managed was to hit one 6 and pinch a lot of singles off the last ball to leave him stranded at the non striker’s end for most of his innings. (Good field settings?) 2 are bowled and as the rains start to fall they are 90 all out in 28 overs. We did offer them some chances with some strategic drops. Chungy would have expected to do better and we all would have expected Walkie Talkie to do better with what could be dolly of the season!


Provided by her ladyship again and we offer our thanks for another splendid spread that we had a lot of time to enjoy as the storm arrived.

We planned to mix up our batting with Darren, Pussy and Cameron to get in early, mixed in with the youngsters and the old guard, Dartsy, Stumpy and Skip to do the 9 10 Jack. The best laid plans are foiled by the weather and by¬†4 o’clock, despite the rain having ceased, the pitch was waterlogged and impossible to play on. We shake hands and let the oppo get back for bed time.


Really early which was odd but welcome. Darren is guilty of saying “i’ll see you in the pub” and not coming. Again. He sounds like every woman I tried to date in my early days. Semtex says he can’t come. Yes, you read that right. Vice pops in and the chat becomes racy in many ways.

PERFORMANCE OF THE DAY. Narrowly won by Jack for a catch, a run out, and 4/10 from 6. Chungy unlucky not to win it with 3/9 from 4 and a catch and a fine hat trick.

SB. Walkling again, who seems to not quite get the essence of this award and revels in winning it! I was on the list for not crushing the opposition when we had the chance and consequently getting washed out before we bat.

A disappointing end but a very good performance. Semtex popped in to watch and sneaked a beer at tea so he wasn’t completely dry.

We do it all again next week with a new Skipper. Vice is off to Tomorrow Land and Skip is away drinking for 2 days.