After last week’s trip to Tonbridge, and the sense that we had let a positive result slip away (albeit while promoting a proper sense of sportsmanship in doing so), this home fixture against old foes Foxbury gave us the chance to bounce back straight away. The team welcomed back Mr Matt Dine for his first game this season and, thanks to the good offices of Ram, we also hosted a guest player, Sunil, to ensure that we were able to put out a full XI. Foxbury had a late withdrawal – Russ P – so they travelled with only ten.
Speaking of travel, the day got off to a tricky start for our glorious leader, who arrived thirty minutes late and sans shirt / lunch. This mean Vice Ross had to take charge (an anathema to him, of course – everyone knows how much he hates it) and negotiates the toss, albeit under “strict instructions” from the skipper on the phone. It was agreed that Foxbury would have first go with the bat in a timed fixture. This proved to be a very good outcome. Ram opens the bowling, with me at the other end (my reaction to this elevation is “fucking hell, really?”), but the skipper knows his onions and it gets results on a lethargic pitch. I get their other opener off my second ball, clipping the top of off stump (Duck 1), then Ram induces their Number 3 to hit a reckless shot in his second over (Duck 2). Their opening bat then tries to launch me off the first ball of my second over and plays right over the top of it – another wicket falls. We now have them 3/4 off four overs – that negotiation is looking like it’s worth a Nobel Prize. The new batsmen decide to drop anchor and keep it tight for the rest of our respective spells. Ram and I are then replaced by Slates and Kuldeep. The change of pace results in a flurry of boundaries, as their skipper takes advantage of some looseners from the new bowlers. However, after he blows off the cobwebs and finds his radar (i.e. after his first over goes for 11), Slates hits the afterburners and bowls like a dream. His next six overs run as follows: maiden => wicket maiden => 2 + wicket => 1 => 1 + wicket => wicket. He finishes with a cracking good 4-15 off 6. Kuldeep has to weather things at the other end to an extent, as Foxbury are keen to get runs where they can and it certainly isn’t going to be when they are facing the Belvedere Blitzkrieg. He picks up a wicket with a nice bit of bowling in his penultimate over. Dino replaces him and sneaks one through the defences of their Number 9 with the final ball of his over (and the innings). We have knocked them over for 83 with 45 minutes to spare (which we would carry over into our innings). It is also worth noting that we concede just five extras.
There is no tea (well, there is tea, but only of the liquid variety, as popularised by the Prefab Four), so we are able to turn around things reasonably promptly. Vice Ross opens with Tom P at the other end. The wicket has been helpful for bowlers all afternoon (six of our wickets were bowled and two were lbw) and that cuts both ways. Ross plays very watchfully, but can’t get the ball off the square without finding a fielder. After 14 balls, he is beaten by a good ‘un and cleaned up without scoring. Tom P hits a couple of nice boundaries but follows not long after for 9. We are now 13/2 off 6. Our guest player Sunil comes to the wicket and looks in decent nick, scoring a boundary, before he too is clean bowled by their opening bowler. 26/1 off 9. The skipper joins Bateley at the wicket and settles a few nerves with some good striking. Their partnership is worth 37 in six overs – invaluable in the circumstances. They cycle through their available bowlers and the third change is the one that gets the breakthrough, bowling the captain for a fine 32 (3 x 4s, 1 x 6). Harry is in then out again without scoring, unfortunately, followed not long after by Ram who scores only 1, leaving us on 64/6 at the end of the seventeenth over. Time is obviously not really an issue, but we are running out of wickets. Kuldeep steadies the ship, as Dave continues his vigil at the other end. But that third change bowler continues to dog us and induces a leading edge from Dave, who departs for 9 (an innings much more important than the numbers suggest), with the score on 86. Slates is the man to ensure that the job gets done. He hits his third ball to the boundary, then Kuldeep seals the win with another boundary. We win what has turned out to be a fairly close game by 3 wickets.
It is no great surprise that deservedly Nick gets the Player of the Day award, given his bowling performance, although his cameo with the bat was definitely useful at such a late stage of the match. The skipper has to front up at accept the Shitbag trophy for: timekeeping; kit failure; failure to count to six and signal no balls while square leg umpire. All in all, a great day and a very good result.
– Paul